Saturday, April 30, 2011

"The Heart Shaped Box: Welcome to Eden (Part One)"

The Heart-Shaped Box: Welcome to Eden (Part One)

Welcome to Eden.

Or, Eden's Den, rather.

Here, you are sure to find something quite heavenly indeed.

So long as pussy is your flavor.

Pardonnez-moi, monsieur! Where are my manners?

Entrez-vous chez "Eden's Den", our hidden, secluded, decidedly illicit, members-only "lap-sitting" club, tucked away on this industrial lot in Detente City's most notoriously colorful hot spot.

My hand-crafted selection of painfully exquisite painted-ladies have NO need for your pleasantry. 

My girls know what you are here for, mon amour.

Around these parts we prefer to cut to the chase.

Who needs small talk, anyway?

Were you REALLY going to invite an Angel to your latest board meeting, Mister CFO of __________?

Is it truly an evening of fine dining for which you wish to buy out our beloved Cookie, the Den's third- in- line mademoiselle,  at your cookie-cutter country club?

Bien sur, I agree! I surely must have misheard.

Perhaps you are unaware, but the charmingly cavalier nature of the particular breed of Eve you will find here is exactly what has kept The Den in business after all these years.

May I be frank?

I am more than happy to assure you that we are veritably untouched by the local livestock. Pigs, shall we say?

We are, however, frequented by those of the floating world...The most highly esteemed. The almighty Whales, naturally.

And, besides, who would ever want to ruin a sure thing?

I am the Madam-in-Training of this establishment, monsieur.

I send only the 'Creme des bitches' to the horny, hungry, perpetually hard, ever-so-eager members of the card-carrying league of the State.

Alas, why do you seem so suddenly surprised?

The Truth does not hurt. In fact, it feels reeeeeally, reeeeeeally good, sugar.


As a matter of fact, The Truth likes to whisper.

She LOVES to shout.

And for a small, precious fee, The Truth can gag upon your silver spoon, devouring your pearly- white goodness,  

Or allow it to stream slowly. All over your cocktail napkin.

In two to three minutes FLAT- if you're the impatient type.

And most pigs are.

Ah, Greed.

She rules this town.

But she does not rule The Den.


That title belongs to the filthiest, kinkiest, most low-down damsel of them all. 

Our Most Heavenly Duchess, a breath-takingly beautiful bombshell.

The greatest mind-fucker of all time.

The Dearest White Witch in the history of our city of Detente, Lady Porcelain

Nee Tessa Delacourt, our shining angel has risen rather quickly to our top rank due to her inherent powers of seduction and eroticism.

Porcelain likes it HARD down here on the Pleasure Strip.

She has an endless appetite for men, their money, and the driving, animalistic force beneath their fine linen trousers.

I must caution you to be prudent, my love.

Lady Porcelain will mindfuck your pocket, your penis, and your belief in your own shadow.


Until you've gone soft.


Or empty.

Porcelain detests broken men.

Nevertheless, her tantalizing cunt has the power to fondle your pockets until it is made abundantly clear.

To you and everbody else.

That you are inconsequential.

She will have stopped caring.

You will cease to exist in her world.

In our world.

Nothing. A blip. A waste of space.

Still, she will continue to smile.

Peer at you innocently beneath her luscious mink and impossibly long lashes.

Purse her Chanel lipstick-laden lips,

Flash her Sphinx-like grin

Carefully conceal the genesis of her spoiled rotten nature.

Part her supple, shapely thighs in your direction.

Thrust her prize-won tits towards your lonely heart.

Massage your neck with her perfectly manicured nails;

Toss her voluminous blonde tresses about,

Poison the air you breathe with the sweet scent of jasmin and lavender tea;

Lower her sinfully seductive lids, shielding her enticingly doe-like sea-green eyes,

Extend her long, lean legs petulantly

Showcasing her dainty feet, bound in black,

Her trademark "bitch" Alexander McQueen stilettos are her calling card---

The men who worship her have paid dearly with their own.

Sir, simply to arrange a proper introduction would require considerably more of your salary  than any "gift" you have ever procured for any other 'temporary soulmate.' 

Or even your wife, for that matter.

I am afraid Our Lady may find you pathetic; earnestly awaiting a pity-fuck.

Ah, I see. You are, indeed, still waiting, I take it?

Oh, yes, I am certain that Porcelain is aware of this.

That is EXACTLY why she smiles.

That is precisely why she giggles ever-so-coquettishly at your jokes.

Did she REALLY lead you to believe you were funny?

Damn, she's good.

And THAT is why she is here.

Porcelain is our lady-in-wait, par excellence. 

Our little diamond devil-doll, who knows full well that you are quite capable of waiting a very long time.

She appears so serene, pleasing to the eyes and ears. Naive. Indifferent.

I know better.

When Our Duchess decides to strike, you will have never seen it coming.

Poor thing! That little luciferina knows you like the Lord's prayer.

Beware. This IS paradise, after all.

                                                   "Welcome to Eden."

************ End of Part One**

-An Erotic Short Story, written by Sandra London of To Live and Grind in L.A. 
(Completed at 8:30am on 04/30/2011)


Friday, April 29, 2011

~A Royal Weekend for a Perfectly Pretty Princess~

So rich. So pretty.

Or maybe it's "So much pomp and circumstance" if you ask Z.J.


I'm actually watching the royal procession live, in full effect. I'm so happy that I happened across it on the =>telly<=. 

Sooo not on purpose, I'm ashamed to admit. 

Had I not been watching the love of my life, Craig Ferguson (smile!)on the late late show....

Well, I may have missed it completely! shhh...

I don't know that I would say I'm as fascinated as some as far as this whole obsession with inherited social status or pedigree. 

However, there is something to be said for refinement, culture, and... official recognition that an earth-bound family amongst us all is somehow...NOT us. Somehow...just...not... common(?!?)

It's only natural that human society desire someone, some thing, or some entity to look up to.  

Progressively, generation by generation, degree by degree, a certain breed establishes a solid foundation. This foundation, this family name carries, in and of itself, a certain reputation. 

A mark. 

A title. 

There IS something to be said for that. 

At least to me!

Congratulations, Mademoiselle Catherine Middleton 

Princess of Britain. 

Mrs. Prince William. 

The Belle of the Ball.

To serve and to submit. But never to 'obey.' ;)

{You are soooo full of win!}

Honor thy new royal family name.

A toast (and tea) to all spectators, fans, foes, and even the indifferent to this moment in history,

Sandra London

~Saw It. Wanted It. Smiled Real Perky. Got It!~

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Sandra London Does It Criminal

Sandra London (aka "me" aka "Menfolks' Most Wanted ;))

does Fiona Apple's Criminal w/

Z.J., Zach Jacken, if you're naughty.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Weekend Girl Update: As The World Turns


Dubai UAE March 22, 2006

OK. I've a few quickies to get your weekend popping off!!! 

As if it hasn't already! 

It appears, as of late, that I'm always...well...LATE to the party! 

I've missed blogging daily like I did during my birthday countdown last month. 

I aim to get back to that timetable in short order.

Fortunately, I was able to keep up the routine all the way up until the jump. 

I was so very happy to BE that darn happy about scribbling all my little nuggets of thought all over your computer screen. 

Those nuggets. 

Positively inundated with food for thought. 

With a slice of sounding off, sexy time, and pure WTF.

It's what I DO. 

OK. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to evoke imagery of eating. 

Can you hear my tummy growling over there?  

"I can haz cheeseburger?"

Oh, wait! I already did. 

But that was, like, hours ago. 

I must admit it: I enter a complete time-warp when I start working on projects or learning (or re-learning) new info bytes. 

Ugghhh...and ick....and...Where does the time go?

I mean, I am having a damn good time doing it MOST of the time. 

But if you would've seen me last night, you would've sworn I 'got the ghost' or had some demons to wrestle with or something. 

Long story short: I had been making so much headway with my main domain. And, then, in a flash it went.....

"Gotcha, bitch!" 

And totally evaporated. Totally. 

And so I eyed my laptop like it was the motherf****** predator. 

I had to show "it" who is running thangs around here. 

I put that baby to BED.

Oh, me. Oh, me and my slippery, sticky fingers...

*Sigh* I need to get out more. Can you tell?

And I SHALL, chick-a-dees! 

Haven't you heard? 

I am an official seminar presenter for the 2011 Exxxotica Expo in Miami Beach (May 20-22nd) and Los Angeles (August   26-28th). 

=>My Seminar Link

(Woot woot!) 

I can hear it now, "Welcome to Miami....Bienvenido a MIAMI!!!!" 

Or maybe: 

"I wanna go to Hawaii. Yaaaaay. I wanna go to Hawaaaaii.*"

Just kidding! Miami is gonna be so gosh dang awesome. For serious.

El Matador Beach Sandra London June 2010

Hasta Mayo,

p.s.: Buy your hall pass for the 2011 Exxxotica Expo here:

*Crank Yankers show reference

Monday, April 18, 2011

My Sexy BulletBoys Lapdance, "Smooth Up In Ya"

I'm being very multimedia-friendly lately!

Never fear!!!

More meaty writing posts are on the horizon.

Currently working on my next erotic short story, "The Heart-Shaped Box" about Tessa: a beautiful, brutal blonde of tiny,spinner proportions.

She unleashes her inner beast on Blanca, an unsuspecting busty Latina who tries to show HER who is boss...and ends up utterly exposed, shamed, and full of Tessa's angry love venom.

Stay tuned,

p.s.: If you want to see more of my latest vids, check out Stockings and Bonds and Kitty Gives a Damn on my YouTube channel at:

Saturday, April 16, 2011

My Radio Interview w/ Silent-J on BlogTalkRadio

Listen to internet radio with Silent J on Blog Talk Radio

Wanna hear me talk dirty, uncensored, and hella cheeky? Then check out this radio interview I did on Friday night with Silent-J of (above)

Friday, April 15, 2011

Friday is for FREEdom

Santa Barbara 2004 Sandra London photo by Glamour Photos
                 Sand and Succubus, shot in Summer 2007 on location in Santa Barbara

                          Friday is for FREEdom

It's the weekend, gang!

And you can party all the more because taxes aren't due 'til Monday!!! Word!

I am hereby offering super sexy damn-near freebies to celebrate while your wallet is saved from a good old- fashioned assault by the system for just a few more days!

All you have to do is complete one or more of the following five requests to receive the goods.

Heck, you can do all five and find yourself up to your ears in my lovely lady lumps*;)

What a visual, eh?

Oh, and the current task rewards are valid until the stroke of midnight on May 1st, 2011.

                                             System Sixty-Nine

Task #1: Sign up to MyGirlFund (free) at my link

Reward: You get 1 free video, delivered to your new MGF account. Make sure to send a free message on MGF letting me know you were referred from "The System".

Task #2: Buy any 2 clips from me on MyGirlFund.

Reward: I'll send you a 3rd clip absolutely FREE.

Task #3: Gift me with an Amazon Gift Card

Reward: Get video clips and picture sets equalling the same amount.

( If what you spend exceeds the amount of content I have, you can request a custom-made video that YOU direct.)

Task #4: Follow me on Twitter @ImSandraLondon (or become a fan of mine on, if you already follow me on Twitter).

Reward: Get one free freaky photo set.

Task #5: Subscribe to To Live and Grind in L.A. here on Blogger

Reward: Get two freaky photo sets.

Your daily boobie,
*<I'm a dork. And you know this, maaaaaaan!> (Warning: Adult Content 18+)

Sandra London photo 2010

~Saw It. Wanted It. Smiled Real Perky. Got It!~

***Examples of Movie Titles Currently Available:
 Romantif***, Girl Fun, The Header, Sandra Captures Zach, Puss in Boots, My F***Buddy and Me, Me and Master Dubya, Hot Tub _____, Sandra and The Musician, A Silent ______.***

Thursday, April 14, 2011

In The Thick of It

Happy Thursday!

I have been as busy as ever but things are starting to become more manageable again. If I thought things were hectic before, no no....

Apparently, there will always be more tasks to complete, schedules to fill, things to see, people to do. ;)

I suppose, in a nutshell, I am getting a lot of things done behind the scenes and I am very excited in regards to everything that has happened lately. 

Like, there have been a few major, spontaneous catastrophes and a healthy measure of serendipity. 

That's kind of how my life has always been.

Trust me!

I'm not an "Oh, woe is me" whiner; never that.

When things go wrong, I can express it in the most monotone, matter-of-fact way.

But the look on my friends' faces after they hear about the latest "Adventures in Sandra's World", well, they sure do consider my life pretty darn interesting.

Mais, la vie est belle.

I have signed on to a few sweet upcoming projects that I'm very excited to undertake.

I will edit them in shortly. 

I definitely want to keep you all updated so you can check them out, if you've a few precious free moments in time.

Please forgive my writing style today, y'all. 

I have been using all of my vital brain juice for restoring and redesigning my main site lately.

Eeeee....and it's almost ready!!!

I am simply trying to make sure to read even more closely than normal, to keep abreast (*giggle*) of any fine print that might be worth committing to permanent memory.

Or, that which may cause me to:

shimmy, smirk and slink away, narrowly dodging a bullet with my initials engraved, swirling menacingly before me as it approaches with the speed of a tiger....

Or a gazelle.

But wait, guns aren't as cute as gazelles....

Or are they?!? jk

Oooh...getting back in the groove. And I like it! =)
Your fair lady, keepin' on keepin' on. Bearing mad fruits and juice,

Sunday, April 10, 2011

A Fawn Flirts in Middleburg ;)

~Sandra LONDON hiding behind Endangered Words in Virginia~
I fly back to the West Coast on my magic succubi wings tomorrow mid-afternoon. I've had an absolutely wonderful, whimsical sojourn in the District of Columbia and its environs.

The first full day was spent in Middleburg, Virginia

I happened upon The Christmas Sleigh, where I bought a super sexy green hunting jacket and sampled regional wine at the Boxwood Winery.  

Dined at the Red Fox Inn where I discovered my new favorite crutch, Raspberry Merlot!!!!

My goodness, this is ridiculous..

It is so hard to amuse me that I seem like a snot half the time...and yet this is my new next best vice in the entire world. 

I summoned a hand-written note from the waiter of exactly where, when, and how I could procure more of this delectable dessert wine.

Absolutely, terribly fabulous. Double swoon. today, earlier...or I guess now I am officially referring to yesterday, I ambled about D.C. and was blown away by the Smithsonian's African Art museum.

Every single piece of art and/or artifact in this museum was completely spell-bounding. 

I felt very....inspired(?)( moved?) as I beholded the very definition of "kalon"* in its purest form.

It is way too late for me to even still be typing as I have an early (for me) flight. 

I only waited this long because I had to find roundabout means to import photos for this post.

So, for now, I kind of want to cut this short..but I definitely plan on fleshing out the corpus of my latest trip back East.

In a short phrase...."Soooo much fun" . 

In a high brow nod, " Evoking a vestige of ancestral consciousness while not diminishing tender moments of 'descipience'**...."

Smithsonian African Art Museum April 2011

And so, this makes either perfect sense or I've had too much Cruz Alta (Mendoza's blend).

More on solid ground..... A domani!!!


Sandra LONDON, posing with African Symbols (April 2011)

Friday, April 8, 2011

Succubus Lives!! Quick Update about To Live and Grind in L.A.

Hello, world!

As you may have noticed, I am no longer blogging with WordPress.

The abrupt decision was not my own, but it has perhaps been a blessing in disguise.

I have changed domain registrars and host servers and am doing what I do best....

Gettin' me learnin' on!

So, I have a whole lot of reading to do; the dream is already ever-present.

That being said, I'm still "here" and I'm not going anywhere!

I am just going to make things that much more awesome.

Because it's worth it ;)

Meanwhile, I am on a bit of a vacay and being the sexiest vagabond ever out here on the East Coast. 

However...."I'll be baaaack" in a couple of days. 

Even on vacations, I still like being a worker bee.

Alas, I will continue to toil away, for at least an hour or two a day while away from home.

Thank you, ________, for house-sitting and being the best guard 'dawg' evAr.

Stay sexy, readers!

Until next time.......

~SANDRA LONDON~ Watch SandraLondonTV (New site design and features on the way!)
Saw It. Wanted It. Smiled Real Perky. Got It!

P.S.: I kinda want to import my old blog posts here, maybe on an "archives" page, but in the meantime, you can of course google search "" and click on the "cached" link just below the search results.

P.P.S.: OK, for the new site's design, you know how the template on's current temporary page is black and white and polka dot-y?

Well, I'm thinking "zebra" for the new border/frame. Then white background, black text, and a dash of pink links. Who's with me?